MyImpressiveWang (10:39:38 AM): Mr. Bill?
IAmBillLatham (10:39:43 AM): Mr. Chris
MyImpressiveWang (10:40:51 AM): How goes it?
IAmBillLatham (10:41:14 AM): pretty good. a little hungover. but mostly pretty good.
MyImpressiveWang (10:41:37 AM): Guess What?
IAmBillLatham (10:42:21 AM): you’re the DC Sniper?
MyImpressiveWang (10:42:53 AM): I’m Iming You From My Phone.
IAmBillLatham (10:44:04 AM): the world’s ending?
MyImpressiveWang (10:44:19 AM): i’m at a job interview. any tips for me?
IAmBillLatham (10:44:45 AM): be calm, be straightforward, lie through your teeth?
IAmBillLatham (10:45:53 AM): and sucking dick may seem a little old fashioned, but that’s how you get ahead in today’s job market
MyImpressiveWang (10:45:55 AM): i did put dc sniper on my resume.
IAmBillLatham (10:46:43 AM): excellent
MyImpressiveWang (10:39:38 AM): Mr. Bill?
IAmBillLatham (10:39:43 AM): Mr. Chris
MyImpressiveWang (10:40:51 AM): How goes it?
IAmBillLatham (10:41:14 AM): pretty good. a little hungover. but mostly pretty good.
MyImpressiveWang (10:41:37 AM): Guess What?
IAmBillLatham (10:42:21 AM): you’re the DC Sniper?
MyImpressiveWang (10:42:53 AM): I’m Iming You From My Phone.
IAmBillLatham (10:44:04 AM): the world’s ending?
MyImpressiveWang (10:44:19 AM): i’m at a job interview. any tips for me?
IAmBillLatham (10:44:45 AM): be calm, be straightforward, lie through your teeth?
IAmBillLatham (10:45:53 AM): and sucking dick may seem a little old fashioned, but that’s how you get ahead in today’s job market
MyImpressiveWang (10:45:55 AM): i did put dc sniper on my resume.
IAmBillLatham (10:46:43 AM): excellent
Jonahnebraska (11:00:54 AM): haha bob hope is dead.
IAmBillLatham (11:01:18 AM): he finally died?
Jonahnebraska (11:01:40 AM): yep
IAmBillLatham (11:01:46 AM): remember how he’s been entertaining soldiers since the civil war?
Jonahnebraska (11:02:14 AM): yeha. haha.
Jonahnebraska (11:02:28 AM): he died at 100.
Jonahnebraska (11:02:33 AM): damn bastard.
IAmBillLatham (11:02:37 AM): so Strom Thurmond died. Bob Hope died. Who’s next?
Jonahnebraska (11:02:47 AM): Prince.
IAmBillLatham (11:02:56 AM): hahahahahhahaha
Jonahnebraska (11:03:12 AM): wouldn’t that be funny?
IAmBillLatham (11:03:40 AM): yeah it would
IAmBillLatham (11:03:55 AM): we should have them all memorialized on a mountain together
Jonahnebraska (11:04:12 AM): like mt. rushmore?
IAmBillLatham (11:04:16 AM): exactly
They had been smoking hash for the better part of the night when Alex started screaming that nothing was linear. He knew it in the back of his mind so clearly, but understood that no one else could see where he was coming from. He understood but decided, albeit loudly, to explain his position.
‘NOTHING MOVES FORWARD!’
‘THERE IS NO ORDER!’
‘MADNESS! DARKNESS! GOOD GOD, MAN!’
He was hysterical and ranting. The equations of time and space. Equilibrium. Conscience and conscious. E pluribus unum. In the end we all go down screaming one by one and mother nature swallows us back into her cunt for all of time.
The bastards just didn’t get it.
So Vinny stuck a shiv in his stomach and gave him a handful of ephedrine.
‘What the FUCK was that for?’
‘Things move in a straight line, man.’
Ok. Three quick directions for some things you need to do today if you live in or around Omaha. You can do this before work or after work. On your way to the bar. On your way to your family function. Just for the hell of it even. The point is, you gotta do it.
Step 1: Get in your car/on the bus/on your bike/walk/whatever the fuck you have to do
Step 2: Go to the Antiquarium
Step 3: Pick up the following local cd’s. Real Time Optimist ‘S/T’, Putrescine ‘S/T’, Sound Of Rails ‘Prelude Of Hypnotics’, Sound Of Rails ‘Night Time Simulcast’.
Step 4: Return home and listen. Or if you’re one of those lucky folks with a cd player in your car (you bastards), listen to them in there.
It’s important you pick these cd’s up. None of these bands are playing anymore as of the last month and a half.
Ok. Enough ranting.
“Please don’t go away until I am comfortable in my own mind.’
An old woman I talked to on the phone at work yesterday said that to me. And all I could think was, that there was no way I could stay on the phone with her until she died.
