“Look out the window. And doesn’t this remind you of when you were in the boat and then later that night you were lying and looking looking at the ceiling and the water in your head was not dissimilar from the landscape. And you thought to yourself why is it that the landscape is moving but the boat is still?”
-Crispin Glover, Dead Man

“I haven’t slept for ten days because that would be too long.”

“When I was on acid I discovered that margarine is better than butter. I saw through the bullshit. I saw beams of light and heard things that sounded like car horns.”

“Alcoholism is a disease, but it’s the only disease you can get yelled at for having. ‘Goddamnit, Otto, you’re an alcoholic!’ ‘Goddamnit, Otto, you have lupus!’ One of those does not sound right.”
-Mitch Hedberg

“You know, David Hasselhoff has that look of constant confusion, like when dogs get bred too much.”
-Henry Rollins

“Back in 1991 I used to hit old people with folding chairs. Now I am a rock and roll superstar.”
-Wesley Willis

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