My car has been in the body shop for so long that the insurance company doesn’t want to keep paying for a rental, and I’m forced to return the one I have and figure out other arrangements. An acquaintance loans me a beater– an old white ’80s four-door sedan, long and chunkity. It runs okay until I’m driving toward an underpass and all four wheels come off at the same time.
I get out of the car, and hold up my hand to stop the oncoming traffic, which stops impatiently. “Shit,” I think, and I sigh. I put one hand under the front bumper and one through the passenger side window, where I can grab the handle, and then hoist up the car with my bare hands and carry it to the side of the road. I gather all the tires and throw them in the trunk.
It’s too late to get four new tires at CostCo, so I pick the car back up and carry it through some wide double doors into a Mexican restaurant and put it up on a tall planter while I use the restroom.
What a pain in the ass!
When I come out of the restroom, there is a small crowd gathered around the car, which is now sitting, tireless, on top of a tall planter. “Oh shit, I’m sorry,” I say. “Let me get that out of here. I guess I’ll just carry it home.” I grab the bumper and the oh-shit handle and pick up the car again.
“Hey, if you need a car for a couple days, I can loan you one,” says the woman running the place. “It won’t be good, but loaners aren’t supposed to be good. It’ll get you where you need to go.”
“Really?” I say. “That would be a lifesaver.”
It isn’t until I wake up that I realize that everyone in the dream was flabbergasted that I could just pick up an entire car and carry it around.
Did you know that if you stare at the sun for 15 minutes a day, that you won’t need to eat food anymore? You will literally gain superhuman abilities and feel like an enlightened person. Obviously you would need to stare at the sun during the early morning or late evening when the sun is at it’s lowest brightness. But NASA did a study and proved that people who engage in this sun-staring practice achieve a state of high spiritual and mental enlightenment.
i like you keef. i need to buy your site